Thursday, July 2, 2009

Extremities

Just a quick post (yeah...we'll see about that) just to update on some things that I've been twittering (tweeting?) and posting about on Facebook.

One...The Bike

I found a fabulous bike that I want. WANT. WAAAAAAANT. And heck. It only costs $1200 (on sale).

Isn't she purdy? It's a Trek 2.1 Triple WSD. Does anyone have an opinion? You can also check it out here.

So, I've been doing a fair amount of riding this week on my old-trusty-transformed-used-to-be-a-mountain-bike-that-now-has-road-bike-tires bike and my HANDS are freekin' killing me! WTF is that about?

Hands? Feet? Next it'll be my hair follicles and then all my extremities will be injuried. GAH! Seriously bike folks, what is up with the hands?

Two - The PT Appointment

I finally got in to see a physical therapist yesterday at Rehab United (RU). I was supposed to see someone on Tuesday, but I made the appointment when I was at the beach with Betty last week, and somehow I entered the wrong time on my iPhone, so I missed the appointment. GAH!!!!!

The good news is that I rescheduled the appointment (after apologizing profusely, even though I still don't know how I could have entered the wrong time...3pm instead of 9am...which is crazy. I would have had a whole different thought process about how to manage a 9am appointment than a 3pm one...and I was completely thinking about afternoon the whole time...but whatever) for the next day (after extreme whining about not wanting to wait until next Tuesday!).

Anyway, for the 3pm/9am appointment, I was going to work with a newer PT. Yesterday's appointment I got to work with one of their senior PTs and he was completely awesome! (There. I got to that point).

He had to do a quick screening (a little frustrating since I'd already done a screening appointment, but whatever), watching me walk, do squats, balance on one foot, then the other... He came up with pretty much the same diagnosis as the screening PT, that my PF issues (and my IT issues back in January) stem from the fact that my left side is really weak.

We did one exercise where, lying on my side, I did a leg lift, tried to push up as Brian (the PT), pushed down. On my right side, no problem. On my left side...I could barely even hold up my leg, let alone against Brian's pushing down.

I was pretty surprised by how weak my left side is, but it certainly explains all the problems I've been having.

So, I'm going to start seeing Brian three mornings a week for the next few weeks to see if we can strengthen the left side AND to get rid of the PF. (Yeah!)

The best part about going to this place (which both Irene and Edith completely recommended to me...so thank you Irene and Edith), is that Brian completely got it...the whole thing about running and me. He was talking to an intern that it was great to work with people like me who were highly motivated to get better (yes, I'm rolling my foot over the frozen ice bottle as I write this). He didn't laugh or even bat an eye when I said my goal was to run the AFC 1/2 marathon in 6 weeks. He just said, "OK then, that's the goal. You can do it!"

He did say that I probably should stay away from running for a bit longer (since it still hurts to walk since the surfing incident, I wasn't surprised and was ready for this), but then he acknowledged that I have to do something to keep getting the endorphin high that I'm used to getting from running.

Now, this is the part where I almost cried, because he understood.

We talked about how not running has been like coming off a drug and that I need to find something to get that high...we talked about biking and swimming (which I've been doing) and maybe water jogging (which sounds dreadfully boring, but I could do it).

But we also talked about how probably, for me, those things wouldn't give me quite the same emotional, physical, and social satisfaction that running has giving me.

And, he's right. And that's when I could feel myself choking back the tears, because I physically and emotionally miss running.

Not to mention socially...I miss running with my friends.

He explained to the intern that running probably changed my life.

It did. In more ways than I can even articulate.

I haven't run for 12 days now (yes, I'm counting). I've been cranky and sullen. I'm eating waaaaaaaaaaay too many comfort foods (for me...that would be chocolate and anything that's bread). It's probably a good thing I was sick last week or lord knows how much wine I would be consuming.

I fret about going back to being a non-runner, about being non-active...pretty much like I was before four years ago when I was fat and lazy and really out of shape.

Evidence - Ignore the fabulous overalls...it was a popular look then...really!

Yeah...that's me... DramaGirl and her uncle are in the water in front of me. Walter and Turbo are in the background. I'm sure he's thinkin' "who's that fat chick?" (Just kidding...he'd NEVER say or think that. Actually when we were looking at these photos, he blamed the photographer for making me look so bad, and trust me I look this bad in ALL of them)

This was taken about 9 years ago, Turbo was about 18 months old. We were at a rock-slide park near Sedona, Arizona on a family vacation. Everyone was having a really good time sliding down these really slippery moss covered rocks into this larger pond, but not me. I wouldn't have dared. Not only because I would have NEVER been seen in public in a bathing suit, I was completely afraid of anything that required physical effort, mostly because I was weak. I'm struck by how, in this photo, I'm not even paying attention to the people around me. I was completely focused on how freekin' difficult it was to walk around, and in truth how miserable I was because everyone else was having fun in the water and I was on the sidelines, watching.

I remember this vacation quite well...one of the things I remember (besides being absolutely fabulous in the denim overalls) was how many active things I wouldn't do. Just doing this hike was a complete effort. I'm sure I got back to the hotel and ate a mountain of food, justified because I'd just gone on a hike...

This is my fear. That I won't be able to run...and I'll become THAT person again.

There's still this little voice inside me that says that all of these injuries are a sign that I really should be THAT person. I mean, who am I kidding with all this running, active lifestyle stuff anyway.

I'm pretty sure I'm not THAT person any longer. But it is part of the reason I almost cried yesterday when Brian was, oh so accurately, telling the new intern how important running had become to me...and I thought, "oh, if he only knew...if he only knew."

Yeah...even with the quirky foot, this is ME!

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OK...Gotta go now, but stay tuned on Twitter. I'm taking Turbo and friends bowling this morning. I'm sure it'll be a fun-filled morning for me!

16 comments:

  1. I know how you feel. It's scary when you look back at where you were. It's almost as if the old you is just lurking around the corner. But alas - you will fight the old you and be victorious. Just do what the PT says and you'll be running again in no time.

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  2. I think you've got the drive to keep yourself healthy and fit. And it sounds like you've got a great PT and with help, you'll be back in the running game and this time off will just seem like a blip on the radar. Good luck! :)

    Recent blog:=- Complaining & Boasting

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  3. Isn't scary?
    I doubt you will go back to that life because you seem to love the life you have.

    Plus you are going to do a tri!

    Recent blog:=- Really, I am working out...

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  4. Love that bike. Penelope, I think, might want to double date -- or, she's also into the group thing -- if you two become an item. I noticed the same with the hands. One part goes numb if I stay in a position too long.

    And you've really come a long way between photos. I don't think you'll ever go back to those other days. Exercise is too engrained in your DNA now.

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  5. OMG - you so inspired me to start this crazy running thing, and now I think, wow, I'm getting to be like Alice, how cool is that!! I have missed you at the track club, and am impressed that you got the whole bike thing going. Remember, we are who we decide to be, and yep, you are a runner! :-D

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  6. You have come so far, it stinks that your injured but sounds like you have an excellent PT. I hope you're able to strengthen that left side and get back to running soon!!

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  7. I have so been down this road! My biggest passion is my kettlebells. When I screwed up my collar bone 2 years ago and could not do them for like 6 months...I was devistated as you are about running. Now look, 2 years later and I'm going to take a workshop so I can then teach others the ways of the kettlebells! You just have to be patient....I know you've heard that over and over and over at least 1 million times....but it is so true-I am proof as well as millions others out there. Keep up with the bike, the hand thing could be seat adjustment-putting too much pressure on your "paws"-do you use gloves? I suggest to wear them if you don't already! Hang in there, there is a reason for this down time in your running life! :)

    Recent blog:=- "Live the life you LOVE!"

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  8. Great post!!! I'm so glad that you found someone who gets who you are and how to work with you and your goals. That's awesome. By the way, that's the bike I've had my eye on too!!!

    Recent blog:=- Fairfield Report II (AKA Better Late Than Never)

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  9. You are so the fit person now. I will help you keep it up! You have to get into bike riding because you can feel the high there too. You just have to get a real bike and up the intensity. You are not the "I can't do it" person because you are the person I know, not the other. A big kick in the butt,
    Mik

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  10. Which Brian did you see? I know I've said this before, but all of the PTs are on the same page with treatment, so if you don't see your original person because of scheduling or vacations, you'll see someone else who will follow the same procedures in treatment and exercises; and since they're all sport's minded they do get the passion behind your sport. I wish I could have gone there right after I had my surgery.

    I also have one of those trip pics, similar to yours... The dreaded "before" picture. You've really kicked some major bootay! =-X You look like an athlete now!

    Recent blog:=- The Best Is Yet To Come

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  11. PS that was supposed to be a :-D

    Recent blog:=- The Best Is Yet To Come

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  12. Lisa Slow&SteadyJuly 2, 2009 at 8:50 PM

    oooooh shiny bike. how does it fit?

    Sounds like PT will be promising to get you back on your way.

    Recent blog:=- Change of Focus?

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  13. Hey, sister, sounds like you got a bit of he old transference going on with Brian the PT ... Hahahahaha! I still remember how I fell in love with MY PT.

    His name was Tony. *SIGH* He totally got me. I blogged about my Forbidden Love For Him, and commenters made fun of me, but they just didn't understand Such A Pure And Wholesome Lurve.

    Philistines!

    Anyway, I totally get where you're coming from (don't fall in love with me now - hahahaha!) and I wish you the best of luck with the PT.

    I think there's little chance of your going back to what you were years ago because once that voice in your head starts in with the nagging - Get Up! Get That Run In! - it never really stops.

    Unless you get that lobotomy. So just don't do that. Hahahaha!

    Take care, sister!

    Recent blog:=- MIA

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  14. You WON'T be HER again because you won't let it...that's a fact, Jack! Sometimes we teeter on the edge of overindulgence or a few pounds but never the former self. You like who you are now and if you can't run (for a minute), I'm certain the other 'stuff' CAN fill the gap.

    YOU gotta get that bike, very sexy. Love bike porn.

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  15. At least you have some before pics. I was so bad that I don't think I have any pics of me in all my glory! I think partly because I would always eclipse the light source....

    By the way - that's a *great* after picture of you! You can be proud of what you've accomplished! You've hit a little speedbump. Time to get mentally tough. Remember - anything that is worth having doesn't always come easy. Your emotions at the moment tells me everything I need to know about what you really want....

    Oh - and the bike looks good too!


    Recent undefined:=-

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  16. Ok, now that it took me a few to figure out this comment stuff ha ha.....

    I'm glad you finally found the right PT! When I tell people that running has changed my life - I get A Look....eye rolling, smirky 'yeah whatever' look. I hate that! I just feel like smacking those people - DUDE, you DON'T know what you are missing!

    Anyway...hopefully you are on the way to pain-free running.

    Love the bike too...you got your penny jar going? ;)

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