Bones & Leather Nipples

Clearly a challenging day...


It’s early and we’re cold Mik, Betty & Elsie before the 80-degree heat and the run/wog/walk up the hill at Torrey Pines).

I didn’t tell anyone this story yesterday...but you know me, I can’t help but sharing all my embarrassing running stories with you on the Internet (even those I won’t tell you in person).

Who knew the first challenge would come before we even started running!

Betty and I had to visit the rest room before the run and were confronted with EXTREME MISFORTUNE...No TP in the ladies room (Trust me, Betty asked everyone who was in a stall)...GRRRR and momentary PANIC since clearly Betty and I were in the restroom for a similar purpose... and both of us desperately needed TP.

NOT good.

But I am a VERY resourceful girl!

Did ya’all notice how I went back to the restroom before we started running?

Did ya’all notice how I took the route map we were all examining with me?

Did ya’all notice (Alberta did) how I didn’t have the map with me when I came out of the restroom?

For BBJ & Edith, let me give you the math: No TP + printed map = TP

Sorry ‘bout that Alberta, my excuse that I “threw it away” was only partially accurate...”flushed it” would have been more so. Aren’t you happy now to know the real reason you didn’t know that the route back to La Jolla Shores was a couple miles farther than the route from La Jolla Shores? (For future reference, I do have Kleenex in my car...a tidbit of information I neglected to remember yesterday morning).

I was gonna tell Alberta about my cleverness when she was telling me about the old guy who was sharing his potty stories with her during the run...but I figured you’d heard enough for the day.

Doesn’t Mik look fabulous? Last week’s train run

What I HAAAAATED about yesterday’s run:

1. HAAAAAATE HILLS (both up and especially down)
2. HAAAAAATE no TP in the restroom
3. HAAAAAATE rock climbing when I want to be running (and the effect that rock climbing had on my quads).
4. HAAAAAATE running in sand (sorry...but I do).
5. HAAAAAATE 80 degree heat at 8 o’clock in the morning.
6. HAAAAAATE the never-ending hill at the Torrey Pines State Park (I just noticed that Toiled Paper and Torrey Pines start with the same letters...hee hee.)
7. HAAAAAATE that Mik was smart enough to run back on the beach and I wasn’t.
8. HAAAAAATE that I left my water belt at Water Station 1...then really needing it through the state park.
9. HAAAAAATE that I essentially stopped running after 7 miles and walked the rest of the way.
10. HAAAAAATE Saucony Hurricane running shoes which I am completely blaming for my weak performance this week (but am now the owner of a pretty new pair of New Balance shoes after going to Road Runner Sports this morning, trying on and making the fitting guy watch me run in four different pairs of shoes).

Clearly, Alberta has not nursed a child... Also, I’m pretty sure that is Boob-Guy in the distance.

What I LOOOOOVED about yesterday’s run:

1. “Where is the fucking beach?”
2. Boob-guy - who continued to check out every woman’s breasts, especially when we were soaking our tired legs in the ocean. He certainly got an eyeful of my headlights there.
3. Betty and I noticed that you could really tell which women had nursed and who hadn’t. As we left the beach, Betty noted, “yeah, when I’m dead and buried, if archeologists dig me up in 100 years, the only thing they’ll find will be my bones and leather nipples.” (If you’ve nursed a kid or two, this makes sense...in any event, we could certainly tell which women had nursed or not when we were in the ocean)...so could Boob-guy
4. BBJ wondered if he’d crossed the line with his last Blog Comment, about a kid’s hand warmer creating “camel toes. Then he shared with us that he didn’t know what item Wilma bought at a neighbor’s “slumber party.” (There is no line BBJ...and if there were, Wilma crosses it all the time anyway...I know she reads this...let’s see if she’ll post a comment now).
5. Speaking of the Slumber party, the line “Get the Towel!”
6. The whole discussion in World Famous about what women wear and whether or not we want guys looking at our boobs (Duh...of course we do!).
7. Face wipes
8. Mimosas (Two bottles worth!) & yummy breakfast at WF (Hooray!)
9. Notorious B.I.G (Juicy), Super hyphie (Keak da Sneak), and Digital Underground (Kiss you Back) song lyrics, which BBJ gave me (he says he doesn’t listen to the lyrics, and being a literacy person, of course I do! The whole time I was listening I was thinking...WTF did they just say?)
10. BBJ’s breakfast treat (Thank-you, again... I love that you’re running with me ...or at least by me).

I’m looking forward to next week’s run...It looks a lot like the train run route (lots of time on Carlsbad Blvd... Flat and on a hard surface. (Behave yourselves!)

I’ll bring the TP--just in case)

Alice

2 Comments

You go Alice!!!

O.k. Alice...I have been a runner for over 29 years now...and I can tell when someone becomes a runner..YOU ARE NOW A FUCKIN RUNNER :) ... EXCELLENT!!!! There is nothing I can think of where in a very short time...you can know someone so well...that is..running with someone.....running is getting in your blood....I can tell...it feels so good when your done...right?? ... accomplishment plus adrenaline release......then looking for a cold beer or three....Keep up the running.....I want to go running with you hot boobed ladies one of these Sunday mornings.....but...there will be no walking on my watch....

Running up a hill,
A.S.

Sunday, April 13, 2008 - 05:52 PM

betty

Great job everyone on the run... some of us didn't have a map and had to wait 4.9 miles to use the restroom - we just pretended we had to go #1!

I'm still mad at Mik for running back on the flat beach with the naken men. I feel so stupid - except I was able to hang out with Elsie for awhile and have a miserable hot and sweaty run!

Thanks Jim for breakfast and to Mik for mimosa's. It was great to spend my anniversary sweating with you all!

Tuesday, April 15, 2008 - 03:59 AM